Leave the Crumbs

So, let’s be honest. We’re all just surviving on caffeine and chaos. Perfection has to take a backseat. A backseat that if full of crushed up goldfish and empty Starbucks cups. We’re late for practice, husband is working late, and the kids haven’t had a vegetable in a week. There are some things in life, no, many things in life that are just going to have to be good enough. We’re going to have to accept the outrageous moments, the ever-growing To-Do lists and dehydration headaches as they hit us. I did a little self-discovery and put this list together, so you don’t have to. I’m positive that this list does not cover half of all we do in a day, but I hope it allows you to cut yourself some slack. Now let’s jump right in, because I know someone will be yelling at you for a snack any minute!

• The way I fold the laundry… It’s clean, you’re welcome. That’s good enough.

• The way the backseat of my car looks …We’re always on the go. You can find a half-eaten pretzel, one Croc, 19 water bottles and all the beads of the bracelet that just broke, but for now, it’s clean enough.

• The organization of my pantry… I have the patience to empty the cereal boxes into the clear containers, but the rice and breadcrumbs are gonna have to suffer in their original packaging, which is good enough.

• My daughter's hair, my son‘s fingernails…Most days I’m making sure both are neat and clean, but there’s certainly days when I actively ignore these issues because, for now, they look good enough.

• My Christmas window … Damn Instagram Reels are always showing the cutest moms hanging the cutest lights. Do I have the energy to start over? Nope, mine is good enough.

• The caramel apple cheesecake I make for holidays … It tastes AMAZING, it looks less than amazing because I’m not artistic and I don’t have the patience. Sloppy but delicious is good enough.

• My compliance with COVID rules … This will likely be its own post, but let’s just say we followed the rules with the attitude “No, but thank you.” We skirted around the bullshit mandates as much as we could and that was good enough.

• Being polite to strangers…I will hold the door for you always, but I will also yell YOU’RE WELCOME quite loudly if you don’t say thank you. I’m petty like that and that’s good enough.

• My holiday diet … Because, come on! Christmas calories don’t count and I have a cutting board to prove it. I’ll resume in Janu-February and that’s good enough.

• Get your own cutting board here!: Christmas Calorie Cutting Board

• My nails… So many pins saved, absolutely no time or energy to sit in the chair long enough. Lincoln Park after Dark is good enough.

• My kids’ snacks…Some are organic, some are stuck in between the couch cushions. It’s called balance and it’s good enough.

• My kids tying shoes and putting gloves on…I want them to learn, but Jesus H, we gotta go! You’ve tried 6 times to do it yourself and that’s good enough.

• The last two pages on their summer assignments…The first 26 pages are perfect, but by the last two…I’m over it and so are they! They’ve done good enough.

• Any art project… I’ll remind you again, I’m not artistic. I’ll have all the best supplies money can buy, but the outcome is gonna be just good enough.

• My South Philly accent … We really do say wooder for water, and I’m not about to correct that now. You’ll understand me good enough.

• Our Italian slang … My family has really only passed down the curse words and the insults. I’m 99% sure we say them wrong, but we get our point across good enough.

• Weeknight and sports night dinners… because you can eat at 4:30pm or 9:30pm, so WTF am I gonna make? Drive-thru is good enough.

• Going to bed and closing down the house…I like everything back in its place before I go to bed. I have to have the counters clear, but for some reason the blankets can be a mess, and that doesn’t bother me. I’m tired and the house looks good enough.

• Speaking of the blankets… There’s a cute wicker basket and on my best day I’ll roll each blanket and neatly place them. But when It’s time for bed, they are bunched into a ball and thrown in the vicinity of the basket, and that’s good enough. More on items my kids are not allowed to have or play with in the house, including blankets and balloons, later.

• How I shove things in cabinets or closets… Because why the hell else do we have doors on them? So that when they’re closed, it will look good enough.

• Saving my kids’ school art projects…because how many turkey hands can I possibly keep? The first 37 are good enough.

• How I outwardly show my faith …I’m very proud of my faith, but do I always practice what they preach? Absolutely no, and if I’m being honest…I’m always worried about it all feeling a little “culty” anyway. A few Hail Marys when it really counts are Good enough. Spare me your Catholic guilt, more on this later.

• Breakfast before school…We’re late and we gotta go, so cereal in the car is good enough.

• Our T-shirt drawers…let’s play a game called “how many can we shove in here and still get the drawer to close?” If it closes, it’s good enough.

• Coffee and wine…most of the time I want the good stuff, but if it’s been a day, just give me anything that’s good enough.

• Pieces of toys or games that I find around the house… Oh, did you need that? Too bad, cause it’s in the trash. The toy will have to work good enough.

• My AOL email…it’s from the 90s and I’m keeping it. It’s on a million and three mailing lists and it’s good enough.

• Recycling…I will cooperate until the blue bin is full. After that everything goes into the regular trash. One full bucket is good enough.

• Homework…because didn’t you just spend 7 hours in school? That’s good enough.

• Junk drawer vs silverware drawer … Can you guess which one is a hot mess and which one I will chop your arm off if you mess it up? My selective organization is good enough.

• My age … What exactly am I gonna do about it anyway? Botox and Vitamin C are gonna have to be good enough.

• Decorating the tree with the kids … I want to make memories, but you’re doing it all wrong. I’m dying internally as I watch them cluster all the ornaments in one spot, but it’s good enough.

• The way the kids are dressed…most of the time. Two different socks and a Halloween shirt in April? Great, let’s go…we’re late, you look good enough.

• Cleaning my house…because I’m not moving the furniture, just so my kids can play smash the Oreos everywhere again tomorrow. It’s clean enough.

• SKINNY JEANS!!!!!! I’m a millennial that survived the Kate Moss era. I will NOT let you undo what JLo and Kim K have done for us. Listen up, GenZ. You ate Tide Pods for fun. So, I’m keeping my jeans. It takes a few jumps, some squats and a hip thrust to each side to get in them, and they are good enough.

• Other people’s opinion of me…because I have a big ass that you can kiss and the confidence to bend over for you. I know I am good enough. More on this later.

• High school and college … I could have been number one in my class. I’m smart and naturally gifted. I’m grateful to God for that every day. But it also reinforced my good enough attitude. I knew that just sitting in the class and absorbing the information was good enough to get me an 85. Had I gone home and studied, I would’ve got a 99. My mother is grinding her teeth while she reads this. Expect more posts about my mom. She taught me that I can be and do anything. She taught me to be strong and smart and brave. To never give up. Climb your Everest, plant your feet and take up all the space you’ve earned. I live everyday trying to fill her shoes. I don’t think I ever will, but I know she’s proud of me and that’s good enough.

This list will likely go on forever, won’t it? The never-ending merry-go-round of motherhood. Does it feel like we’re juggling flaming swords while riding a unicycle backwards? Yes. Would any of us trade it for the world? Nope. Our kids are tucked into warm beds with full bellies every night. We gotta be doing something right. Our kids do not see our failures, the calls we forgot to make, appointments we forgot to schedule and the clothes we’ll NEVER iron. They have no idea if we separate darks from lights, balanced their screen time with outside time or scrub down the inside of the fridge. They know our love and support. They know we believe in them and that we will cross every ocean, slay every dragon and climb every mountain to protect them. We’ll do it looking fucking fabulous, too. So, leave the crumbs on the floor, move the goddamn elf and go get yourself a glass of wine.

Let me know what else you do that’s Good Enough, because Sis, we’re all in this shitshow together.

Call your mom, say your prayers and thank a cop. XO